omg! are you hungry yet? FUDGE! oh…fudge. <— this will make sense in a bit.
I feel like I aways get into this energize bunny mode at the beginning of the year and I always have the same thoughts every year: when will this fizzle out? That is my biggest fear…things ending
In this post, I’m going to dive into fear and at the end, I’m going to share this book I’m reading which has already given me so much clarity in the first two chapters.
WHY I WILL NEVER BE FEARLESS
I use to think that we had to be fearless but if we don’t have fear, we might walk out on the street and get hit by a bus. Fear actually helps us stay safe but how fear got attached to all the negative things that happened in our lives is when you give into it, fear stopped you from doing the thing you love.
My goal was to change the world with my content, get a bunch of praise, and make a lot of money along the way. Then fear set it! How?
Self doubt chats I had with myself, other people’s negative comments, not feeling accepted, and most of all… the fear of losing it all!
For a while, I thought I lost it all but I didn’t, I was just at a stand still.
Through this standstill, I learned that I would never want to be fearless ever again but instead embrace my fears.
Your fears aren’t the enemy but a little warning to try to help you stay safe. But if you’re always safe then you will run into the habit of never growing and in my opinion, that’s no way to live life.
HOW DO WE EMBRACE FEAR?
The first thing I needed to do was identify my fears. In this case, I was afraid of losing it all. Since I fed into that fear for a moment, I was noticing I ways allowing my depression to take over which actually made my fear to become true; I was losing it all. By submitting to my fears, I was allowing them to happen.
For the most part, I am the type to embrace them but with so many life challenges and confusion going on, my vision started to get really cloudy. Hence my long funk.
This is my take away from my last funk; it really showed me exactly what I was afraid of.
Knowledge is so powerful and putting a name to your fears is truly liberating. Now giving it a name has allowed me to embrace the fear which will eventually turn into actions; bravery.
This is how to embrace fear…by giving it a name then taking actions.
Remember in my last post how I told you that our life doesn’t have to be a formula but formulas do help us achieve a better life?
Here’s a small tip to help you become more brave: create a plan to help you take an idea into actions.
Being brave means to just take actions but actions can’t happen without a plan. This was the missing component while I was in my funk. Instead of focusing on my steps, I was worrying about how I will mess up and lose it all.
HOW DO I START AN ACTION PLAN?
Just do it is a bunch of bullshit. I use to say it in my previous posts but it’s not all that simple. What I was really trying to say is, just sit down and look at your ultimate goal and work backwards. It’s super funny because I did create a goal worksheet for this a while ago and I think it’s a good time to bring it back. One moment…let me get you the link:
I once read that someone said that it’s stupid how people pressure others to start journaling but there is actually science behind it. We need to see or hear something AT LEAST 3X to have a chance to have it stick in our minds and that’s why I am a believer in journals. Sorry to say but our brains are not built to retain every single little thing… that’s why I think writing things down is super important.
You’ve heard all of this from motivation speakers and most likely follow a formula and I don’t want to take you away from a really good habit even if it isn’t mine. My goal is to let you know from another person is, keep going because I promise you, it’s working. I personally stopped and it stopped working.
Now if you don’t have a place to start, coming from a former teacher who created lesson plans, here’s what I do to help me get started with an action plan.
I create an objective or a goal I want to achieve:
Let me check my list… I want to lose 20 pounds. Oh wait, here’s fear again seeping into my brain. She’s saying… you are gonna fail! Failing is the name I’m giving to this fear and now it’s easy to work with.
Objective: to follow the Whole30 for 30 days
The next step is to write down how I will be able to meet this goal.
- eat what’s on the list
- don’t look at the scale
- drink water
- drink black coffee
- tell people no if they ask to go out to eat
- do this with a friend
This list seems like a lot but the next steps is to ask yourself: “What do I need to do to get started?”
Typically I’m making my action plans in the morning so I’ll start with something simple…drink black coffee.
Now this is why journaling is super important. If you’re trying to achieve a new goal… guess what! It’s going to be hard and that means a lot of thoughts are going through your mind. I like to reflect and not only give myself a to-do list but also add a column for the things I achieved that day. Don’t cross off the stuff you did but instead celebrate it!
THANKS FOR STICKING AROUND
I know my blog posts do get really long and hope you know how much I appreciate you for sticking around this whole time. Now the secret to getting out of my funk was starting a new book for 2020. It’s called FEAR IS MY HOMEBOY.
I actually got this as part of a PR package and I was a little hesitant to start the book. It was one of those moments when the Universe know what’s best for you more that you know for yourself. I’m only in the beginning of the book but the value I have gotten from it already has been spectacular.
Be sure to check out the book and if you’ve decided to start the book, I would love to follow your journey! When you end up getting it, don’t forget to tag me on Instagram to let me know your thoughts! Happy reading and happy planning!
Last year, I wore this dress for New Years and I am obsessing over white dresses. I feel like you can wear any color throughout the year now! Here are some of my favorite white dresses I’ve found that are reasonably priced!
Disclosure: Some of the link above are affiliate links, meaning, at no extra cost to you, I will make a commission if you click through and make a purchase.